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♥♥♥ TAR14: Mel & Michael White - Father & Son

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slayton:
An 'amazing' journey
Former Pasadenan Mel White shows the world that gay dads can be great
By Carl Kozlowski 05/14/2009

Mel White well remembers the craziest thing he had ever done: skydive — at age 68 — over the Swiss Alps in an attempt to become a millionaire.

It’s a once-in-a-lifetime moment that’s not only etched in his memory, but one witnessed by up to 12 million television viewers nationwide and perhaps tens of millions more around the world on the CBS reality series “The Amazing Race,” in which 11 pairs of contestants raced against time and faced other challenges all over the planet to win a million dollars.

But jet-setting around the globe was just another in a series of unique life experiences for White, a onetime Pasadena resident and a biographer and speechwriter for such conservative Christian icons as Jerry Falwell and Billy Graham. In 1982, the then-41-year-old father of two came out publicly about his sexuality and embarked on a quest to show that gays had a place in Christian churches.

Signing up for “The Amazing Race” at the request of his 38-year-old screenwriter son Mike (“Chuck & Buck,” “Orange County,” “School of Rock”) brought them together. Traveling the world with his son for five weeks gave him time to mend fences that had been broken by his change in lifestyle nearly three decades ago, while giving his message of gay parents being loving and capable an enormously effective platform.

“It’s the kind of thing you can never duplicate, so you have to enjoy it while you’re in it,” says White, speaking of his TV experience from his home in Lynchburg, Va. “And to do it with my son — imagine the gift it was to us to do a trip around the world for 35 days. When Mike told me once, ‘You really smoked ’em, dad,’ that was one of the proudest moments of my life.”

A gift from God
Such close bonds were rare, especially after Mike, at age 11, discovered Mel’s big secret. Mel married his wife, a long-time Pasadena arts activist, at a time when homosexuality was still regarded as an illness that could be “cured” or overcome, and tried to make the best of it for years.

“Being evangelical, I thought conservative Christians were right and I was sick and sinful,” Mel says. He and his wife were in therapy “until I realized that my sexual orientation was also a gift from God, and to accept it and celebrate it was God’s intention for me.”
The couple remained married until their children were in college. At that point, they divorced and Mel segued into a new life with Gary Nixon, whom he met while attending All Saints Church in Pasadena. After more than 25 years together, the couple married on June 18 — shortly after the California Supreme Court struck down the state’s ban on same-sex marriage — at All Saints, while visiting from Lynchburg.

Mel and Nixon have since staked their legacy on the formation of Soulforce, a national organization that trains people in the principles of nonviolence, “with a particular focus on eliminating the religion-based oppression of gay people.”

“Mel has been a profoundly influential voice for those seeking to reconcile their spirituality and sexuality in a culture that for too long sent messages that it was not possible to be a faithful Christian and be gay or lesbian at the same time,” says Rev. Susan Russell, a minister at All Saints Church and director of its Claiming the Blessing gay rights outreach. “As a trailblazing ‘out’ Christian, Mel’s leadership helped bring countless LGBT [lesbian/gay/bisexual/transgender] people of faith out of the closet and into the community. And his work with Soulforce — focused on peaceful, nonviolent protest as a means of achieving equality — has been an inspiration to those who are working in the civic arena to make liberty and justice for all not just a pledge but a reality.”
     
A whole new world
As it turned out, Mike was a rabid fan of “The Amazing Race,” and had been accepted to the show with a friend as his traveling teammate. But when his friend backed out at the last minute, Mike reached out to his Dad.
“I never thought I would be representing any population. Yet I did represent senior citizens, parents, gay parents and gay men — all these groups have been writing us and cheering us on,” says Mel. “So it’s been fun breaking impressions of what a gay parent looks like and acts like. It was fun getting responses from around the world to how we responded to each other and worked together. It may have struck some caricatures down, but if not, I sure had some fun trying.”

And what fun it was in locations like Switzerland, Germany, the Alps, Austria, Transylvania, Siberia, India and Thailand. But while he was having a blast with Mike, Mel found that his age caused some problems, one of them a groin injury.

One of the more dramatic moments of the experience, based on the opinions of CBS PR flacks and the number of Web hits received for the footage online, came when Mel had to figure out how to paraglide off the top of a mountain in the Swiss Alps.

“We all either had to paraglide or run the two miles down the mountain, on a rocky shale path. The show advisers kept saying there wasn’t good enough wind to paraglide safely, and I thought I lost the race for both of us right then and there, because there was no way I could run down that distance,” explains Mel. “I was waiting for the wind to change and the show staff asked me if I was praying for help. I said I can’t waste God’s time praying for the wind to change for me, but I can be thankful for the view up here and thank Him if the wind picked up. And just as they were interviewing Michael about how he felt with his Dad losing the race for him, the wind picked up and the guide asked, ‘Do you mind turbulence?’ I said, ‘No! Let’s go!’ and we jumped out over the Alps.”

Having survived the trip and garnered a respectable fifth place out of the show’s 11 teams, Mel White looks back in gratitude for being able to renew his relationship with his son.

“I learned that there was a lot of life left in this old fart, though I didn’t know I had it in me. I learned how much more love and respect I have for my son, who’s wise, clever, smart and fun to be with,” explains Mel. “I learned the world is small and, being so small, I’ve wondered anew why we can’t put violence away and learn to get along. We have too much in common to be divisive. When you travel as fast as we did on the show, it kind of blurs the world’s differences and suddenly Jaipur [India] is a city in Iowa and you see it all as a collage or kaleidoscope where all the colors get along.”

http://www.pasadenaweekly.com/cms/story/detail/an_amazing_journey/7244/

TARdevotee:
I was watching a bunch of movie trailers and I stumbled upon Zombieland and I'm not 100% certain but I'm pretty sure the man sitting on the toilet being attacked by a zombie at around 1:11 into the trailer is Mike White! Watch the trailer at www.zombieland.com and check it out. Can't wait to see it!

Neobie:
I vote yes!

puddin:
Neobie......... you rock!  :lol: :lol: :lol:

DeafRacer:
Hahahah, the picture cracked me up! I'll make sure to show it to Mike when I see him next week!!

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