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The Bachelorette Season 5

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RealityFreakWill:
EPISODE 3 ELIMINATION RESULTS

FIRST 1 on 1 DATE:

Ed....he got a rose

GROUP DATE OF 11 GUYS:

Robby got a rose

SECOND 1 on 1 DATE:

Sasha....didn't get a rose and was sent home

ROSE CEREMONY:

Jake
Wes
Juan
Michael
Reid
Jesse
Mark
Tanner P.
Mike
Kiptyn
David

RealityFreakWill:
Bachelorette Blog: Ed Sweeps Jillian Off Her Feet

In week 3, Jillian shares a few “awkward” kisses, goes over the edge (literally) with Ed and gets is blown away by Robbie D’s acting chops.

Hey Guys! Wow! Am I alone in saying that was one of the craziest episodes ever! (And somehow I think that won’t be the last time I say that) with all the romance, drama and kissing, and my first tears … even my head was spinning when I watched it!

At the time, I remember there being some tension in the house, but not that much! Remember — anything that I don’t see — I don’t know about… so I had no idea of the magnitude of conflict that was going on. It’s times like those that I really wish I had a secret little camera to get the inside scoop. That way I would have stormed right in there and put a stop to all that nonsense.

On to a more positive topic … the dates this week were over the top… literally! My date with Ed was truly the definition of “living on the edge.” At the time, Ed seemed so easy-breezy about going over the edge of that building, but he later revealed to me that he was a nervous wreck! The best part about Ed moving into the house was his house attire — Ed would lounge around the mansion like he owned the place, wearing a silk robe and cucumber eye masks (and later on, drinking blended margaritas at 8 a.m. with Robbie!)

For the record, some of the kisses on the western date were really awkward (sorry guys!). But I totally appreciated how the guys were all really going for it, and I had fun being a good sport! I am so not an actress, so the scene work was nerve-racking for me. It wasn’t until the last scene that Robbie D was finally able to calm my nerves a bit. He put me at ease, and dealt with his scene with such class. I was really proud of him, and had a blast acting with him. That’s why I gave him the rose.

Actually, thinking back, I was also very proud of Tanner for sporting that ridiculous costume. The poor guy was last to be “outfitted,” and that was all that was left He was such a good sport about it — even when I made fun of his furry chaps.

That week, unfortunately, ended with me having to deny Sasha the rose on our date. This was an extremely hard situation for me. I knew at the time, there were other men in the house that were “less perfect” for me, but I also knew it wasn’t fair to keep Sasha if I didn’t feel the connection. Sasha is such a great guy, and I was touched by all that he shared regarding his accident. Still, I wanted to be fair, and that meant ending the date with disappointment for both of us.

Thank you again, for tuning in every week. As time goes on I can promise you even more romance, laughter, adventure and yes… even more kissing … (sigh)

Yours truly,
Jilly

http://tvwatch.people.com/2009/06/02/bachelorette-blog-ed-literally-sweeps-jillian-off-her-feet/#more-13395

RealityFreakWill:
The Bachelorette Episode Recap: June 1, 2009

In this week's episode, the guys film a Western, crazy David confronts calculating Juan, and Wes somehow manages to yet again work in the song he wrote for Jillian.

Welcome back to the Bachelorette recap. With me as always is my lovely and opinionated fiancée, whose enthusiasm for the show is waning, because this week's episode was so long and kind of boring. So, to begin:

The episode begins with a typical Bachelorette one-on-one date (helicopter, rappelling from a skyscraper, hot tub, booze) that ends with Jillian giving Ed a rose. Then a bunch of the guys go on a group date that requires them to film a Western with Jillian.

We have to assume her suitors include a lot of good actors — you know, guys pretending they want to win the Bachelorette when they actually just want to be the next Bachelor — but you can't tell from their performances in the Western. Some highlights:

— The script calls for Jillian to kiss lots of the guys. Michael describes Brad and Jillian's kiss as "one of the most awkward tings I've seen two people do together."

— Robby the bartender says he hasn't had a girlfriend in two years and hasn't kissed a girl in a long time, thus earning the second official nickname of the Bachelorette recap.

Fiancée: What a Prudence Merriweather.

The first nickname, of course, belongs to Daniel Plainview. For an explanation click here.

Prudence and Jillian share a kiss. On a scale of 1 to 10, he ranks it a 50. (As an aside, if you're going to ignore the scale, why not go for 60? Or even 70? Jillian says her kiss with Prudence was the one sincere kiss of the day.)

Country singer Wes steals Jillian away and says he doesn't want to watch her kiss other guys. "Not that you're cheating. I mean you sort of are," he says, accusing her of cheating before they're even together for the second time in the season's three episodes. Jillian says it's sweet that Wes is a little bit jealous.

Next, everyone goes to a typical Bachelorette party. (Rooftop, hot tub, booze.) Reid hangs out with Jillian and isn't sure whether to kiss her. Just as he tries, Juan shows up. The show plays Matador music. Get it? Because his name's Juan. Muy racista!

Juan talks to Jillian. Cut to David saying he'd like to kill Juan. What? On a 1 to 10 scale of craziness, this merits a 50. Or, heck. A 60.

Fiancée: Ohmigod, David would like kidnap her and throw her in a shed.

Me: Wes's possessiveness is okay, but David's is scary?

Fiancée: Sure. Wes wrote her a song. That excuses everything.

Everyone hangs out in a hot tub on the rooftop. Tanner P., the foot fetishist, goes off on how great Jillian's feet are. He starts kissing them. Later, in a supposedly unrelated development, Jillian and Robby get out of the hot tub. The other 30 or so guys hang out in the hot tub together as she gives Robby a rose. Then Jillian plays the guys the film of the Western they've filmed, saying it seems like some of them forgot they were on camera during filming.

Jill, I promise: None of these potential Bachelors ever forget they're on camera.

Next, Daniel Plainview gets a one-on-one date. He wins the best mixed metaphor of the night by saying he considers himself a wolf. Most people stay "in line," he says, while he's "always looking for that mythical unicorn." Here are some of the reasons this is a ridiculous thing to say:

— Wolves are pack animals, known for never hunting alone.

— Unicorns, as Daniel Plainview notes, are not real.

— Even if unicorns were real, there is no mythology that involves then being hunted by wolves; additionally, no one fantasizes about being hunted and disemboweled by their partner. Unless they're dating crazy David.

Meanwhile, back at the house, Wes notes that he has more on the line than the other guys because he's written Jillian a song. This is a great point that totally helps him make the case that he isn't just here to help his music career. No it doesn't.

Next, Daniel Plainview takes pictures of Jillian at an automotive museum. She stretches out across the cars in her bare feet. Tanner P., if he really is a foot fetish and isn't just using a middle-of-the-road fetish to differentiate himself and become the next Bachelor, must be soooooo mad right now. Daniel Plainview reveals he was in a tragic accident several years ago: He flew out the window of a truck that later landed on him.

Jillian: That's crazy!

Fiancée: Jillian's eyes are glazing over, and I can't tell if it's because she's bored or because she's drunk.

Jillian insists she was very moved by Plainview's tragedy.

Fiancée: Do you think she's ejecting him or he's staying?

Me: Staying out of pity.

Jillian: [Daniel Plainview] is a great person.

Fiancée: See? He's going home.

Plainview says he's told three ladies in his life that he's loved them, twice in high school and once in college. Then he brings up the mythical unicorn again.

Me: Jillian, please! You're from Canada. You know about wolves not hunting unicorns —

Jillian: That next chapter [in life] is so profound and so huge, it's like going out and finding a unicorn —

Fiancée: There's no way she's down with the unicorn thing. I would bet my life that she cuts him. She looks as bored as I would be if I had to date this guy.

Again back at the house, Wes plays all the guys the song he wrote for Jillian. The guys are extremely unenthusiastic. One or two other guys play some songs as well.

Tanner P: The guys playing guitar, I'm not sure what their agendas are. Are they here to win over Jillian or win over America?

Either way, the song has won over my fiancée.

Me: Does it bother you that the song only has a beginning, not a middle or ending, and that he just keeps singing the first line?

Fiancée: They don't have time for him to play the whole song. The show is only nine hours.

Back at the museum, Plainview talks about Jillian mothering his children and Jillian decides it's time to send him home.

Jillian: I wish I could be that unicorn he's looking for, but I'm not.

Props, Jillian! She sends him home — on a bus. And so Daniel Plainview becomes the first guy to go on a group date and not get a rose.

And then: Oh boy. When everyone is asleep, Wes goes and stands under Jillian's bedroom window and again sings her the beginning of his song.

Fiancée: Why is he performing in the terrible fleece? He's fine. Sing it bare-chested!

Jillian invites Wes upstairs to finish the song. If it has an ending. He goes upstairs.

Wes: I'm gonna play it again.

Me: See? He has to just start over again and again and open he's conveniently interrupted. 

Fiancée: I'm liking this song. I think my favorite part is the beginning.

Later, Jillian and the guys get together for a cocktail party. Jillian pulls aside David for a long-awaited heart-to-heart, and then Juan appears to pull her away.

Fiancée: Juan is such a [expletive] [expletive]

Me: Okay, fine, but David's nuts.

Juan teaches Jillian to say "I think you're marvelous" in Spanish. Jillian says Juan seems to be on the show for her, and not the wrong reasons, which is code for "to promote a music career." She says Juan is always a gentleman and attentive.

Later, she talks to Tanner P., who talks about his love of feet, and tells Jillian that he, unlike the other guys, is there for the right reasons. Jillian says she feels comfortable with Tanner P. despite his foot fetish.

David complains about how much he dislikes Juan, which freaks everyone else out.

Ed: Dave's a little unstable right now.

Reid: He looks like he's about to kill someone.

David tells Brad that Juan is here for the "wrong reasons" — secret code for, "maybe you don't have one-third of a song to promote, but you are trying to be the next Bachelor or something."

Standing outside, David challenges other guys to tell Jillian that Juan is terrible. Juan walks into the conversation, and David tells him to go inside, because he's talking about him. Juan turns and leaves, like a non-wolf. No unicorns for you.

Fiancée: Juan is kind of a wuss. But I think more than that he's smart. Because those other guys, particularly Dave, are drunk and delusional.

Juan appears outside again, sans Matador music. David tells him to go back inside.

David: You're 35 years old, bro. Stop being a cheese ass and be yourself.

Juan looks stunned. Sweet bartender Prudence says he agrees with David "about a 100 percent." Wait, is David right? Prudence's support lends David some credibility.

Me: David is the only interesting part of the show.

Fiancée: I like that he might legitimately kill someone. That's compelling television.

Jillian, talking to the great Chris Harrison, says she thinks Juan is a bit more "calculating" than the other guys. Then the guys line up, and Jillian gives roses to:

Jake, Prudence, Mark, Jesse, Tanner P, Wes, Juan, Michael, Kiptyn, Mike —

Chris: Gentemen, it's the final rose tonight —

And it goes to David.

Me: So good for the show.

Fiancée: I hope the producers are only milking the Juan-David dispute (along with Wes' supposed jealousy and Tanner P.'s rather pedestrian fetish) to lend excitement to an otherwise boring show and that Juan isn't in real danger.

David hugs Jillian.

Fiancée: His reaction's cute! He actually likes her.

Tanner F. and Brad go home.

On a scale of 1 to 10, we rank this episode a 5. No need to go off the scale, thanks.

Next week: Someone claims other dudes on the show have girlfriends.

http://www.tvguide.com/Episode-Recaps/bachelorette/Bachelorette-Episode-Recap-1006507.aspx

RealityFreakWill:
ABC Press Release


IT'S MAKE OR BREAK TIME AS JILLIAN INVITES THE REMAINING BACHELORS
TO HER HOMETOWN OF VANCOUVER, ON ABC'S "THE BACHELORETTE"

A Dramatic Two-on-One Date Guarantees One Man a Ticket Home

Are There Really Bachelors Who Have Girlfriends Waiting for Them?

"Episode 504" - Jillian goes home to Vancouver and the 13 remaining bachelors excitedly follow her, all anxious that they fit in with her lifestyle. In a true Canadian adventure, Jillian invites a group of the men on a competitive curling date, but only the winning team gets to join her for a romantic sunset cruise around the city of Vancouver. Kiptyn is the lucky man to receive an intimate one-on-one date and a home-cooked meal back at Jillian's place. But the dreaded two-on-one date involves two very different bachelors vying for the one rose and ends on a snow-covered mountain with one man being sent home heartbroken. However, when one of the bachelors discloses to Jillian that some of the men supposedly have girlfriends back home, she demands the truth from those bachelors, throwing the rose ceremony into turmoil, on "The Bachelorette," MONDAY, JUNE 8 (8:00-10:02 p.m., ET), on the ABC Television Network.

Jillian's first one-one-one date in Canada goes to Kiptyn, who caught her attention right from the start. They share a very romantic evening, kayaking to Jillian's favorite market to pick up all the ingredients for the home cooked meal she will prepare for the two of them. Back at her place, the couple has a serious conversation about love, and Kiptyn reveals a flaw that has hindered him in past relationships. Is there a rose in his future?

As Vancouver gears up to host the 2010 Winter Olympics, ten men go on an Olympic sports date that is inherently Canadian -- competitive curling. But the losing team goes back to the hotel, while the winners join Jillian on a real crabbing boat for a picturesque sunset cruise around the city. Each of the five men tries his best to charm the Bachelorette, but one man's attempt at flirting ends up an embarrassing disaster. Jillian finally gives a rose to the man who truly impressed her on the date.

Both men on the two-on-one date are extremely anxious as they meet Jillian at beautiful Stanley Park. The trio is whisked away in a helicopter for stunning city views, landing at Grouse Mountain, where a snowball fight relieves some of the tension. Each bachelor takes a different tack with Jillian at dinner: one acts like he's on a one-on-date with the Bachelorette and lays his heart on the line, and the other, feeling like a third wheel, decides to hold back and relies on his ability to make Jillian laugh to keep him in the hunt for her heart. In the end, she gives one man a rose and the other, crushed, is sent back down the mountain and home.

At the dramatic cocktail party, Jillian is in for some stunning news. One bachelor reveals that some of the guys may have girlfriends waiting for them at home. Shocked and tearful, Jillian abruptly cancels the rest of the party, and tempers flare among the men as they're left to contemplate her accusations. In the deliberation room, Chris Harrison offers to help Jillian find out the truth, but he also warns her that she may not be happy with what she learns. What if it turns out to be someone she's really falling for? At the rose ceremony Chris gives the men a chance to tell Jillian the truth. What happens when she hears what they have to say, and how will it affect whom she decides to give roses to?


The 13 remaining men are:
David, 27, trucking contractor from Dayton, OH.
Ed, 29, technology consultant from Chicago, IL.
Jake, 31, commercial pilot from Dallas, TX.
Jesse, 27, wine maker from Carmel Valley, CA.
Juan, 35, general contractor from Santa Monica, CA.
Kiptyn, 31, business developer from Encinitas, CA.
Mark, 26, pizza entrepreneur from Denver, CO.
Michael, 25, break dance instructor from Astoria, NY.
Mike, 28, baseball camp owner from New York, NY.
Reid, 30, realtor from Philadelphia, PA.
Robby, 25, bartender from Spring, TX.
Tanner P., 30, financial analyst from Dallas, TX.
Wes, 32, musician from Austin, TX.

http://www.abcmedianet.com/web/dnr/dispDNR.aspx?id=060209_02

RealityFreakWill:
The Bachelorette Episode Recap: June 8, 2009

In tonight's episode, crazy David gets too comfortable, Jake pulls back, and Tanner tells Jillian some of the other guys have girlfriends.

Hi, and welcome back to the Bachelorette recap. This was a pretty solid episode, especially at the end, so my lovely fiancée and I, your regular re-cappers, will dive right in.

The episode begins with everyone relocating from Los Angeles to Vancouver, which the magnificent Chris Harrison describes as Jillian's hometown. But it seems that Chris has been forced to take part in some conspiracy to promote Vancouver, because Jillian, according to her official ABC bio, is actually from Peace River, Alberta. Which is 850 miles away from Vancouver, in another province.  (Province is Canada-talk for "state.")

Jillian welcomes the guys to The Coov (in this recap Vancouver will be known as The Coov) and informs them that it is the site of the 2010 Winter Olympic Games. She goes on a one-on-one date with Kiptyn which consists of kayaking to a market and buying food that Jillian prepares for dinner.

Jillian: That's every girl's dream. For her to be in the kitchen, and sort of hot and flustered because she's so worried if the meal turned out right or wrong and her guy comes and kisses her on... part of the neck.

[Awkward pause.]

Me: That doesn't seem like a very feminist ideal.

Fiancee: No, that is indeed every girl's dream — every woman's dream.

Me: But what about being treated equally?

Fiancee: Nope. Only Monday through Friday. On the weekends I want my apron ripped off next to a hot stove.

Me: But I got us tickets for the Vagina Monologues this weekend.

Kiptyn mentions that he's not used to pursuing people, so he ends up with people who pursue him. The fiancée and I agree that he doesn't seem excited about her. They kiss, she gives him a rose, and somewhere, Gloria Steinem weeps.|

All the guys except Mark and Mike, who've been chosen for a two-on-one date, compete in a curling competition. Curling may sound mysterious to American audiences, so let me explain: It's kind of like pétanque, but on ice. (Pétanque, of course, is a form of boules.)

While the other guys curl, Michael, the breakdancer, gets cuddly with Jillian. Throughout the curling, Jillian wears a The Coov 2010 sweatshirt. The team that includes pilot Jake and potentially violent David wins. She takes them on a boat as a reward.

Once on the boat, Jill tells Jake he seems perfect. Jake discloses that he's not. He later confesses to viewers that he was somewhat taken aback by the conversation: "I honest to God am not sure what she's looking for."And so he becomes the second guy of the episode who is maybe possibly less into Jillian than she is into him, Kiptyn being the first.

Later, Jillian talks to David, who is best known for repeatedly threatening to beat or kill Juan, who he regards as overly suave or fake or something. Jillian says that tonight, she wants to see his gentlemanly side. David discloses to Jillian that "her ass is faaaaan-tastic."

Jillian: When David and I are really comfortable he gets a little too comfortable with me.

David next expresses a certain fondness for Jillian's ****. We don't know what **** are because the show beeped it, but we're pretty sure it refers to her "pétanques."

David: I think she is into me.

Next, Jillian gives a rose to Jesse, saying he's someone she got off to a slow start with. Bachelorette obsessives take note: In an interview with TVGuide.com's own Matt Mitovich, she mentioned that the guy she ultimately chooses could well be someone with whom she had a slow start.

Next, Mark and Mike go with Jillian on the two-on-one date. Mike is more aggressive, while Mark, a pizza entrepreneur, is more shy. He likens himself to a quarterback behind a line of defensemen. My fiancée, who has fallen in love with him, in a not-going-to-break-off-our-engagement kind of way, describes him as "a puppy in a bag of marshmallows, with saggy, velvety fur." That means she thinks his nervousness is cute. Jillian gives a rose to the sweet schloopy puppy dog.

Later, at the cocktail party, Jillian talks to Reid, another guy my fiancée thinks is cute. Reid says he wants to kiss Jillian, but she says first he has to ask a random question. He asks about her first crush, and she says it was a guy named Vincent who sang a song to her. Reid worries that this means Wes has the advantage, since he's written her a song and played her the first line 11 million times. Reid also says Wes is only here for his career. My fiancée says Reid is her favorite. He may also be my favorite.

Next, talking to Jake, Jillian tells him she recognizes he's been "pulling back." He says he wants to make clear that he's being himself, and isn't pretending to be perfect. "If you're looking for a boy, you've got that too," he says. "You've got a whole room full of boys."

Tanner later pulls Jillian aside to tell her some of the guys have said they have girlfriends. But he won't say who they are. She says she understands, and hugs him. She then tells the guys she's heard some disturbing news and that the cocktail party is off.

Prudence Merriweather is very angry the cocktail party is canceled before he got to talk to Jillian. It's unclear whether he's mad at the guys who have girlfriends or the guy who ratted out the guys who have girlfriends.

Jillian, talking to Chris, joins in the pro-Coov conspiracy by calling The Coov "my hometown." She and Chris agree to confront the guys.

As Chris, Jillian, and the guys gather together, Jake says he would be "really, really pissed" if he found out that one of the guys had a girlfriend. David, meanwhile, is really, really pissed that someone "is snitchin'." He of course blames Juan and urges Jillian to cut the person who snitched. No one admits having a girlfriend, or snitching.

Tanner P, the snitch, accuses Juan of looking at him.

Tanner P: Juan, you better stop looking at me right now.

Juan says he's just looking around.

Me: This has gotten pretty good.

Fiancee: Mmm-hmmm.

Me: Do you think he should have ratted them out?

Fiancee: Yeah. I think he was trying to help.

So, apparently, does Jillian. She gives roses to Reid, Prudence Merriweather, Ed, Michael, Wes, Jake, and, finally, Tanner P.

Archrivals Juan and David are sent home. Juan is really classy about leaving. David says he feels pretty wronged, and he suspects, wrongly, that Juan "threw me under the bus."
 
Let it go, dude. Shouldn't have mentioned the ****.

Next week: Tanner says Wes has a girlfriend. But does he tell Jillian? And an incredible game of pétanque: Coov style. No, not really.

http://www.tvguide.com/Episode-Recaps/bachelorette/Bachelorette-Episode-Recap-1006720.aspx

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