Topic: Ranking EVERY SURVIVOR EVER (400-399 UP!)

[Cagayawn]

Yeah.... that's right. I'm going to rank every single Survivor contestant to appear on the show. This probably won't be AS controversial as the previous ranking, but... prepare to disagree A LOT with me.

NOTE: For the most part, these placements are based on both how much I like the contestant and how entertaining said contestant is. Gameplay is mostly obsolete, since there are many people that I hate that are great at the game. This is also my opinion only - nothing in the list is canon. If you disagree about a placement, post about it all you like, but please don't flame.

The OP will have an updated list of the placements and of the remaining contestants.

LIST:

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424. Phillip Sheppard
423. Colton Cumbie
422. Russell Hantz
421. James "Rocky" Reid
420. Terry Deitz
419. Becky Lee
418. Alicia Calaway
417. Yul Kwon
416. Ben Browning
415. Natalie Tenerelli
414. Denise Martin
413. Tom "Big Tom" Buchanan
412. Corinne Kaplan
411. Brandon Hantz
410. Sundra Oakley
409. Brian Heidik
408. Jeff Kent
407. Jim Rice
406. Joel Anderson
405. Matt Elrod
404. Roger Sexton
403. Brandon Quinton
402. Spencer Bledsoe
401. Alicia Rosa
400. Andrew Savage
399. Alex Angarita

REMAINING:

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BORNEO - 16





AUSTRALIAN OUTBACK - 15




AFRICA - 14




MARQUESAS - 16





THAILAND - 15




THE AMAZON - 15




PEARL ISLANDS - 15




VANUATU - 18





PALAU - 20





GUATEMALA - 16





PANAMA - 15




COOK ISLANDS - 17





FIJI - 17





CHINA - 15




MICRONESIA - 9



GABON - 17





TOCANTINS - 16





SAMOA - 18





NICARAGUA - 20





REDEMPTION ISLAND - 13




SOUTH PACIFIC - 14




ONE WORLD - 16





PHILIPPINES - 14




CARAMOAN - 10



BLOOD VS. WATER - 10



CAGAYAN - 17

The first update will come either later tonight or tomorrow morning. I plan on doing two or three updates a day.

Who do you want to win? Who do you want to fail miserably? Which opinions of mine will you rip me apart for? Predict below!

[Cagayawn]

FIRST UPDATE!

- 424 -
PHILLIP SHEPPARD

Is this a surprise? I honestly don't know the general consensus on Phillip for this forum. Regardless, Phillip is easily the single most despicable human being to ever appear on Survivor. Phillip's entire shtick is to come into the season, act "zany" for the cameras, pride himself on being a goat, and let an alpha male snatch the win with little effort. Phillip's actions in Redemption Island helped ruin the season by making Boston Rob's win as predictable as humanly possible. Even THAT isn't all there is to Mr. Sheppard. Along with that, Phillip also suffers from entitlement issues and is one of the most uncomfortable people to ever grace television. His accusations of "racism" directed towards Steve were ridiculous and unbelievably cringe-worthy, to the point where I was ready to quit the show forever.

In a horrifying twist of fate, Phillip returned for another season, and was just as awful (if not more so). He seems to have this magic power to ruin every season he's in; it just so happens that RI and Caramoan are my two least favorite seasons of Survivor.

My main hatred for Phillip, though, is that he is SO obsessed with being the next Coach. Here's a tip, Phillip: COACH WAS ENTERTAINING BECAUSE HE WASN'T BEING CRAZY ON PURPOSE! WHEN YOU DO IT ON PURPOSE YOU LOOK LIKE A TRYHARD AND AN IMBECILE! Phillip is plain, unadulterated trash. This horrible excuse of a human being does NOT deserve any more of my precious time.   

HINT FOR 423:

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Has been on more than one season

[Leafsfan.]

 

[Air]

Russell or Colton pls

[Cagayawn]

- 423 -
COLTON CUMBIE

I'm fairly certain that just about everyone hates Colton, and with good reason. During his first season, he sucked up all the airtime by being both being racist and bullying Christina. In fact, Colton was pretty much the entire focus of every single episode until his "evacuation". The problem with this, besides him being unbelievably abhorrent, was that his endless need for the spotlight led the other castaways to be criminally underdeveloped, which, of course, led to One World being the most boring season of Survivor EVER. I didn't care about literally anyone throughout the entire season, even after Colton left (this will be reflected in this ranking ), so watching OW became more of a chore than something I actually enjoyed.

Colton came back for Blood VS. Water, but claimed he was going to be more positive. That lasted about... three days? Once the second episode rolled along, Colton became his usual, over-the-top self, stealing the spotlight from everyone else on Galang. Thankfully, he quit very early on, but he still managed to be horrible throughout his extremely short stay. In a nutshell, he's the only Survivor that's universally loathed, and he deserves to be. He was HORRENDOUS on the show and is a pitiable human being.

HINT FOR 422:

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Yeah, it's Russell.

[Air]

Good

[stekay]

I loved Colton both seasons

[Air]

I loved Colton both seasons

stekay we all know your taste is horrifying

[stekay]

I loved Colton both seasons

stekay we all know your taste is horrifying

 

[Cagayawn]

- 422 -
RUSSELL HANTZ

Ugh. Russell is easily the most visible person to ever play da game, so it's impossible to not have an opinion on him. I am firmly on #TeamNatalie&Sandra, since both are deities who deserved the win over the fat sack of turd people call Russell Hantz. Why do I hold this opinion?

First off, Russell is a bully and a terrible human being. His plan for each season he's appeared in is to recruit "dumb girls" - which, btw, reeks of sexism - """""""find""""""" a bunch of idols, and claim to be "the greatest player to ever play da game". Survivor is and always has been a SOCIAL experiment, so Russell's love of being a complete jerk-off with the sole purpose of feeling superior to others makes him the single WORST player to ever play da game. Even IF someone isn't instantly opposed to voting for a redneck sexist jerk-nozzle to win, his personality is surely enough to prevent him from getting his disgusting paws on the million.

Did Russell have any good moments? Well, there was that one time he spread a rumor about Brandon in a bathroom in Orlando... actually, that makes him even worse of a person. Russell is absolutely HORRIBLE to Brandon to the point where it's uncomfortable to watch or even hear about. Other things Russell has done is cheat on his wife and abandon his family for... Mikayla. Poor Mikayla :/

Overall, Russell is a season-ruining jerk-off sexist pig who is a large part of why many recent seasons aren't all that great (Nicaragua, Philippines, and Cagayan are the newer seasons I consider to be good).


With those three irredeemable, obvious picks out of the way, let's get to the more interesting stuff.

HINT FOR 421:

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One-time player on a season before Micronesia, but after All-Stars

[selfeviction]

I hope Francesca makes the Top 400 lol

[Cocoa]

natalie white for top 1 plz <3

cagayawn threads are accurate <3 <3 <3

i love this thread <3

omg huhu can i crey now ;_; <3

#nataliewhiteDOMINATION
#parvatisucks
#kimpossiblesucks
#NATALIEWHITEISOURQUEEN
#cagayawnISlove

[Cagayawn]

- 421 -
JAMES "ROCKY" REID

In my eyes, there are five men in Survivor history who are worse than Hell itself; those five make the bottom five of this ranking. "Rocky" is the fourth male who was so godawful he doesn't even deserve to make the Top 420.

So... Rocky. Rocky, in short, was a hyper-sexist bully who was uncomfortable to watch throughout his whole journey. He started off by targeting the women for being weak, etc. while being a complete jerk to Anthony in the process. I don't even like Anthony, but the way Rocky treated him was horrendous. Rocky treated Anthony like he was a slave, a piece of trash, an animal... you get the idea. He was given so much screen time that, much like One World, other characters failed to get more development or focus, which, in turn, made Fiji boring during its end stages.

Rocky is the last of the only four contestants I can safely say ruined the season they were on. He only places higher than Phillip, Russell, and Colton because those three helped ruin multiple seasons, while Rocky ruined only one. Still, Rocky is irredeemably horrible and deserves much more hate than he gets.

HINT FOR 420:

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Male from a season before China

[selfeviction]

I did really hate Rocky too, the way he treated Anthony was horrendous. imo

[Cagayawn]

I had a lot of stuff going on, but I PROMISE I'll update tomorrow.

[Marionete]

*facepalm*  @ the bottom 3. I really did hate Colton & Phillip, but there are far worse survivors if you're ranking all of them.... Like, cmon dude....

People like Purple Kelly are ranked higher?! Yeah, I'm done with this list already pretty much.

[Air]

PURPLE KELLY <3 What a star. How can you hate Purple Kelly?

[stekay]

PURPLE KELLY <3 What a star. How can you hate Purple Kelly?

After just finishing Nicaragua I forgot she existed until her boot episode

[Cagayawn]

I find the entire idea of hating Purple Kelly to be odd, especially since she was mostly a non-entity. ANYWAYS, I'm very busy with school and whatnot, but I'll update.

- 420 -
TERRY DEITZ

More sexism! Yaaaaay!

Terry is single-handedly responsible for how boring post-swap La Mina was. The entire tribe seemed to worship him throughout the whole game, which led to very little suspense at any of La Mina's TCs. Along with being a bore, Terry also manages to be beyond vile. It was clear from the beginning that Terry thought all men were stronger than all women, which was proven time and time again over the course of Panama. The worst example of this was how he voted for Aras to win, even though he had aligned with Danielle AND he hated him (this was probably because Aras was a man...).

Don't worry, though! It only gets worse. Along with being boring AND sexist, he believed that him serving the country made him better than everyone else/the rightful winner/smug, etc. Writing about him makes me angry, so I'll stop there. Terry can die in a fire for all I care.


HINTS FOR 419/418:

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419. Woman from a season before Micronesia
418. Woman that was on a season with returning players

[coolio]

He's such a challenge star though <3

[selfeviction]

I rooted for Terry because he was an underdog. lol

[Cagayawn]

He's such a challenge star though <3

That's only a positive factor in this ranking if it's hilariously unexpected (i.e. Kelly Wiglesworth)

[stekay]

Terry was  Thank gawd Casaya existed

[Marionete]

PURPLE KELLY <3 What a star. How can you hate Purple Kelly?

Umm, I never said I hated her. Like someone said, you can't really hate a non-existant contestant like her.
I'm watching Nicaragua atm and I only remember her getting 3 confessionals.

Anyway, what I wanted to say is that she didn't play the game at all, was just lucky to have the controlling people on her side, but she brought nothing to the show whatsoever, made no moves, wasn't good in challenges at all and... we'll she quit for ****'s sake.

A terrible player, isn't that what we're ranking here? If you're telling me she was a better player than the ones currently ranked below her, I have nothing else to say.

[Cagayawn]

PURPLE KELLY <3 What a star. How can you hate Purple Kelly?

Umm, I never said I hated her. Like someone said, you can't really hate a non-existant contestant like her.
I'm watching Nicaragua atm and I only remember her getting 3 confessionals.

Anyway, what I wanted to say is that she didn't play the game at all, was just lucky to have the controlling people on her side, but she brought nothing to the show whatsoever, made no moves, wasn't good in challenges at all and... we'll she quit for ****'s sake.

A terrible player, isn't that what we're ranking here? If you're telling me she was a better player than the ones currently ranked below her, I have nothing else to say.

It's based mostly on how much I like each contestant, actually.