Author Topic: Reds Kevin's Amazing Australian Recaps  (Read 1948 times)

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Offline redskevin88

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Reds Kevin's Amazing Australian Recaps
« on: May 25, 2012, 12:35:38 AM »
Hey guys, I will be posting my recaps on this thread.

Offline redskevin88

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Re: Reds Kevin's Amazing Australian Recaps
« Reply #1 on: May 25, 2012, 01:58:14 AM »
« Last Edit: May 27, 2012, 07:30:01 PM by redskevin88 »

Offline redskevin88

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Re: Reds Kevin's Amazing Australian Recaps
« Reply #2 on: May 31, 2012, 03:32:06 AM »
I owe an apology to tarflyonthewall. I have 1,127 words written down, and I'm slightly less than halfway done.

Offline tarflyonthewall

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Re: Reds Kevin's Amazing Australian Recaps
« Reply #3 on: May 31, 2012, 04:45:55 AM »
Yeah, it's hard to be short with a show like this.

Offline redskevin88

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Re: Reds Kevin's Amazing Australian Recaps
« Reply #4 on: June 01, 2012, 05:10:57 AM »
Leg 1 Recap

As morning dawn rises Grant Bowler, the host is standing on top of a lighthouse. From Sydney, eleven teams will embark on a journey over 65,000 kilometers, the first team to cross the finish line will win A$250,000. The other teams will just go home, if they are lucky, with whatever toys, trips (Zuji Australia, a sister company of Travelocity is one of the main sponsors this season) or money they win. Seven teams will be eliminated, if they finish last in an elimination leg.

We meet our lucky eleven teams this season. The cops are introduced first, followed by Michelle and Jo, Sticky and Sam and James and Sarah (to some cowboy music!). Adam and Dane gets introduced fifth, followed by Sue and Teresa, whose bags are full of dressing stuff. Ross and Tarryn gets introduced seventh and Lucy and Emilia eighth (they are schoolteachers, which means that if they violate a rule, they get a choice of a 30-min penalty or a hundred lines).

Kym and Donna say they “Don’t need friends, just need more money” and I’m thinking of changing my predictions (my prediction being James and Sarah being the first team out with the U-turn). Joseph and Grace are introduced, and Paul and Steve are last. Any teams standing on their way they will step them out, I smell u-turn.

Grant says the immortal words… Who has the right combination of  stamina, strategy and teamwork to win a quarter-of-a-million Aussie dollars and the Amazing Race Australia?

Intro: All the teams are smiling now, but will it last? [A HAPPY BOM!]

Teams line up and are getting ready. Grant tells them the news and we hear there are 12 legs of the race. The race will be longer, and teams will have to earn it. The rewards for the first team will be larger, they will find out at the first pit stop. Grant tells them to read the clue (and when the clue says walk it means walk, not take a taxi and then walk to the pit stop).

Grant tells them the first clue is on top of their backpacks.  Grant gives the magic words, “The World Awaits” tells them to race hard, race safe (one team once turtled their SUV in South Africa) and they are off.

Teams have A$150 for this leg of the race, and are making their way to boat a boat across a wharf in Sydney Harbour. They have to find a maze of cars, and then navigate out of the carpark. They can only drive in forward or reverse, kind of like a game of Rush Hour.  Teams may have to work together.
« Last Edit: June 08, 2012, 09:40:11 PM by redskevin88 »

Offline redskevin88

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Re: Reds Kevin's Amazing Australian Recaps
« Reply #5 on: June 08, 2012, 09:41:33 PM »
Sarah is running in Hunners. Oh boy!

The undercover cops, the aborigines. and Paul & Steve are working together to get their cars out. It works as Paul & Steve are out. Teams now fly to Manila in the Philippines and once they arrive, make their way via taxi to Quiapo Market and find a balut egg seller. Paul has Filipino heritage, but has not been to Philippines for a long time.

How many bimbos does it take to get a car out of a puzzle? [Answer: 2]

Sticky is driving, and has no problem. They however, have problems following Michelle & Jo. Sue & Teresa use their ACME Australia Corporation Aura Cleansing Spray (TM, Patent Pending) and get sitar music. We get it, they are hippies.

Sarah doesn’t take kindly to “shut up and listen” and promptly waddles off. They are starting to make Vanessa & Ralph look like good people in comparison.

Michelle & Jo have made up time on Paul & Steve, both are level at the airport. Sticky & Sam are lost. They are now crossing the Sydney Harbour Bridge.

Commercial: 9 Gag Singapore’s FB page is so lame, the owner manages it from his wheelchair.

Sarah has proven herself totally useless, and Vanessa has an Australian BFF. Lucy & Emilia are hitting out the competition (or the eye candy) but teams are leaving. Sue and Teresa “didn’t work out it was a puzzle until we got the last car out”, and must be thankful this this race has no starting-line elimination. Or its evil cousin, the airport elimination.

Lucy & Emilia are yelling at cab drivers for directions and are arguing whether its a good move or not. (Answer: No) Joseph and Grace thought that James was Sarah’s son like Toni and Dallas. (Answer: No)

The flight is delayed for an hour, but all teams are on one flight anyways, so there is nothing gained, nothing lost. There is the usual rush for taxis when teams land.

At the market, teams have to eat eight baluts to get their next clue. They are a popular street snack in the Philippines, but like the host said, they are an acquired taste and gross, being fertilized duck embryos. The cheerleaders arrive, and they have problems.

Commercial:  Honda’s reverse-camera technology. No excuses for missing that nun crossing the street while you reverse.

Ladies & gentleman, the future Miss Australia!

Teams start arriving at the challenge. Paul has never eaten them before, so either a) he’s a rich kid and doesn’t eat street food, or b) it’s not that popular. I’ll go for a). But they seem to have no problems. Paul suggest that Kym and Donna have a dominatrix/slave relationship, now that would be interesting. Donna is allergic to eggs and Kym is thrilled. Bad slave! The cops make a mistake of looking at what they are eating.

Paul & Steve are first to complete the task. They will now sign up to travel ten hours via bus to a village called Daraga, which Wikipedia tells me is in Albay Province, same as Amazing Race Asia 4.

Grace has the eating task. It must be nice for a girl to have a big mouth.

The cops are stuck in traffic. Beeh Baah! They end up paying 2,000 pesos (no decimal point and it’s not a typo, its expensive, like about 59 Sing dollars).

Emilia doesn’t do eating challenges. The cheerleaders are struggling. Sticky has peeled an egg with one arm.

The cops’ driver knows a shortcut. Boy for police officers, they are quite naive.

Sue works for Greenpeace and WWF (Wildlife not wrestling). Despite their reservations, they move quickly. The cheerleaders are now worried about elimination.

Commercial: Vladimir Putin blames rebels for latest Syrian massacre. Reason: They were there. News at eleven.

The hippies are asking forgiveness from the universe (but not their tummies). They are lucky as Sticky & Sam have no money, and no taxis either. They take a jeepney, a type of public bus, to the bus station (I wonder if the clue specified they should take a taxi, and if so, would they get a penalty?)

Paul & Steve are on the first bus, along with Kym & Donna and the cousins. The second bus carries Joseph & Grace, Ross & Tarryn, Lucy & Emilia, Sticky & Sam and the last bus carries the hippies, cops and cheerleaders. Like I said earlier, the cops are naive. The first bus departs at 12:30am.

Michelle & Jo are still stuck at the balut, they were there for a very long time. The locals call them “Super Twins”. Bus 2 is departing, at 1am. The cops are shocked (?) to be in tenth place. That must be some shortcut.  Michelle & Jo arrive just as the bus is about to leave (or so it is shown).

First bus arrives and a snake charmer gives teams their next clue. It is a detour, Pig or Jig. From TARA4 leg.  In the Pig detour, teams must catch a pig in a muddy pig pen, the pigs have been greased to make them hard to catch. It is a game called Catch the Oily Pig. In Jig, teams must learn and perform a traditional fiesta dance, and impress four Legazpi Idol judges to get their next clue.  (TARA4 only had two). This is a Tortoise/Hare type of detour, the Tortoise detour is the Jig and the Hare is the Pig. Jig is easy unless you have two left feet, or you’re useless at following instructions, and the Pig is fast and uncomplicated, and if you get a lucky pig, you will finish very fast.

Paul & Steve and Adam & Dane choose Pig, Kym & Donna chooses Jig. Donna is an aerobics instructor, and thinks dancing would be much easier.

They have to grease each other up before going to catch the pig. Steve manages to grab a pig, but Adam has trouble, but also grabs a pig. Paul grabs a second pig. At the dancing detour, Kym & Donna change detours. Paul “accidentally on purpose” crashes into Dane, and both teams are done with the detour. They have to travel via jeepney to Misibis Bay where they will find their next clue. The cousins spend valuable time washing up.

Donna is scared of the piggies. But they catch two pigs as the second bus arrives. All teams on the second bus choose pigs. Emilia doesn’t like eating oily pork. Kym & Donna are now in third place.

Sticky has no problem catching a pig one-handed. They are in fact, in fourth place. Ross & Tarryn are in fifth place. Joseph & Grace are in fifth place.

At the bay, we learn they have to build a raft using materials provided, and paddle it across to some remote paradise beach, the last team to do so, may be eliminated. The cousins and the workmates are fighting for first place. Back at the pigs, Lucy & Emilia give the pigs the Zev treatment, and it works.

The last bus arrives. The cheerleaders and the hippies choose Jig. The cops and James & Sarah choose Pig.

Michelle & Jo are professional cheerleaders. But they do not master Jig correctly and have to do it again. Lucy & Emilia are in 7th place, having successfully done pig. The cops are in 8th place.

And now comes the funny part. As Sarah grabs a pig, she slips and fall, and everybody in the crowd can see her panties. They are laughing at her, shame shame. James & Sarah leave in 9th place. Michelle & Jo switch to Pig.

Commercial: I’m tired of writing this, I think I should go Facebook and relax. Oh wait, this show is on Facebook too. Nuts.

At the bay, teams are struggling with the rafts. Kym & Donna arrive in third place. Paul & Steve struggle in the water.

Michelle & Jo are done with Pig. The hippies get out the spray. They are the only team to finish Jig.

Ross & Tarryn and Sticky & Sam are at the rafts. Sticky ties a knot one-handed. Joseph & Grace, the cops and the sisters arrive. If the raft breaks, you have to do again. Kym & Donna go into the water.  Adam & Dane sink close to the pit stop. They try again.

Offline redskevin88

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Re: Reds Kevin's Amazing Australian Recaps
« Reply #6 on: June 08, 2012, 09:42:06 PM »
Commercial:  Manchester United to sign a Japanese superstar no one has ever heard about. News at eleven.

The hairdressers are at the beach, and hope not to finish last. Paul & Steve are sinking. Ross & Tarryn’s raft is doing fine. Kym & Donna are also heading to the pit stop. Using brute force, Ross & Tarryn overtake the other teams.

Paul & Steve are bickering as Paul wants to take a penalty. Lucy & Emilia are also not doing so well, while the hippies seem to be doing okay. Joseph & Grace are paddling.

Kym & Donna and Ross & Tarryn hit the beach at the same time, and Ross & Tarryn win the footrace and hit the mat first. They win A$10,000 thanks to Swisse Vitamins. They also win the Salvage Pass, which they can use to get a 1-hour head start, or do a Cho brothers, and save another team. Ross is the oldest racer in this race at 55, but Mel White won a race leg in Season 14 at age 68, so they are not the oldest team to win a leg. Also, according to Amazing Race Wikia Jeff was 60 and  they won Leg 7 last season. Kym & Donna hit the mat in second place.

The hairdressers have good technique in rowing, while Michelle “sees whinging” in Jo’s face. Lucy & Emilia are encouraged to see Paul & Steve restart.

James & Sarah hit the mat in third place, while the hippies hit the mat in fourth. Nice comeback! The cops lie on their belly and pass Adam & Dane. Nice to see the cops playing smart for once. Sticky & Sam are fifth, Joseph & Grace sixth, and Michelle & Jo in seventh.

Lucy & Emilia are in trouble. They just want to make the pit stop.

Commercial: Take your vitamins and live till 80, but remember, heaven is a wonderful place.

The sisters reread the clue, it doesn’t say you can’t get help, which they do. (But then again, it doesn’t say you can get help either).

Cops are in eighth place, while Adam & Dane are in ninth. Paul & Steve gain on the sisters to take tenth, so the sisters are the last team to arrive.

Grant Bowler gathers Ross & Tarryn for the salvage pass decision, and a decision is made to save the sisters, so they are not eliminated.

Offline georgiapeach

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Re: Reds Kevin's Amazing Australian Recaps
« Reply #7 on: June 08, 2012, 10:12:07 PM »
Good job kevin!
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