March 18, 2004
‘Survivor’ or ‘Soprano?’ Lex acts like a wise guy, not a standup guy
By PEGGY TOWNSEND
Sentinel staff writerFor a minute there I thought I’d accidentally recorded an episode of "The Sopranos" instead of "Survivor: All-Stars" Wednesday night.
I mean, there was this guy giving the I’m-sorry-I-gotta-whack-you-but-this-is-business speech, and then his best friend was begging for his life, and then he got whacked anyway.
Just like the Mob.
But then I noticed the guy doing the whacking was way too skinny to be Tony Soprano, for one thing. And I never heard of a Mafia guy who wore rings through his nipples.
So I checked the listings and sure enough, this was "Survivor" and it turns out it was Santa Cruz’s own All-Star Lex van den Berghe giving the speech and whacking his friend Ethan Zohn right out of the game.
Boy, all the only thing missing was the FBI and a pair of cement shoes.
At first, I agreed with what Lex said about not being able to carry deadweight like Ethan into the merge. Every former winner in this game, which pits former survivors against each other, had already been booted from the game.
Forming an alliance with Ethan, who won the $1 million prize in Africa, would have been like Lex painting a target on his own back when it came time for the two competing tribes to merge.
And I thought Lex was a standup guy when he went to tell Ethan that even though they were good friends outside the game of "Survivor," this was business and Lex had formed an alliance to vote him out.
But then, there was that moment when Lex’s eyes got a little wild as he lifted up his vote for Ethan at Tribal Council later that day.
"It’s really, really easy to win with grace and dignity," Lex said of Ethan. "It’s much harder to lose with the same grace and dignity.
"Let’s see how you do," he said.
Then he clicked his tongue and winked his eye.
Is dat you, Tony?
That was just plain mean, I thought.
But then I realized all that crabbiness might have been just because Lex — and the whole Mogo Mogo tribe — were very, very hungry.
I mean, the Chapera tribe not only stole M&M’s whole bag of rice during the reward challenge last night, but took their fishing spear too.
That’s the Pearl Island version of having your ATM card stolen.
It’s very, very bad.
And, very, very mean.
Which brings us to the Chapera tribe and Rob Mariano, who annoys me more than a wool shirt on a hot day.
That guy is a real putz. There he was waxing romantic over Amber Brkich, his island squeeze, as tender music played in the background.
Amber, he said, has a great personality, is really sweet, "and her ass is smokin’, too."
What a Romeo, or is it Robeo?
Which brings me to what was the best part of the show.
It wasn’t the shin-banging, log rolling challenge or the fact that Jerri Manthey couldn’t shoot an arrow to save her life.
Nope. It was the tease which hinted that host Mark Burnett is doing the old tribal switcheroo next week — having everyone take off their tribal scarves, or buffs as they call them, and draw new ones.
"What happens next will turn their lives upside down," Burnett said solemnly, as the camera cut to sweet, smokin’ Amber sounding a lot like Terrell Owens and saying she got a bad deal.
Does that mean the Robeo is going over to the Mogo Mogo tribe?
Or did Amber get the old free-agent trade?
And what does that mean for Lex if the two tribes get mixed up?
They don’t call this the Mob, I mean, All-Stars, for nothing.
Anyway, to answer Lex’s question at the old Tribal Council vote, yes I think Ethan did lose with grace and dignity and I liked his closing speech and the bro hug he gave Lex as headed off for the walk of shame.
I’m sorry you got whacked, old pal.
http://www.santacruzsentinel.com/archive/2004/March/18/local/stories/04local.htm
