Big Brother Alum
Posted on August 28, 2013 By Jun Song
Iím thankful I was on Big Brother so many years ago, because I would never go on the show now. Iíd never go back on the show again. For a while I thought I would given the right amount of compensation from CBS, but no. I wouldnít put my friends and family through the hassle, and I donít want to be remembered for going on the show anytime after this current season. Big Brother is becoming less and less CBS, and more MTV.
When they were casting for All-Stars in 2007 I was flown out to LA and I met with the gang at CBS again. Iíd lost my dad to kidney failure in 2004, and my mother had tried to take her life as a result in 2005. I sat there with the producers and I answered their questions about whatís new and how does a second season of Big Brother sound to me. I felt like I was in a cave most of the interview, and I felt disconnected from reality. I was an emotional wreck since winning BB, but nobody knew it.
I answered all the producersí questions but they knew my heart wasnít in it. Iíd already returned to work in banking since winning my season, and Iíd also been running a little side business. I was focused on making money and running away from having to deal with death and depression in my family. Going back on Big Brother was not the right move for me. All-Stars happened without me, but I did judge a Food Competition that season with Marvin and Nicole. That was enough for me.
Since All-Stars Iíve stayed in touch with many people still on the Big Brother team, even after moving to Belgium and starting a family of my own. Itís their job to keep in touch with BB alum. CBS always has a way of tracking you down somehow even if the rest of us think youíve gone MIA. Itís their job. For all those who think CBS doesnít keep tabs on BB alum to use them if ever there comes a time, for anything, youíre wrong. They do. Itís their job, even for dinosaurs like me. Dinosaurs can be coaches too.
Their jobs must be getting harder in recent seasons with all the death threats and FBI-calling. Iím thankful my season was so long ago when less was at our vicious fingertips. I remember my cousin Miran, who was barely a teenager, had watched my season from home and ventured online to a Big Brother forum. In the forum I was being torn apart by rabid fans who hated me, and naive little Miran attempted to defend me. Quite innocently Miran thought that letting internet trolls know that she was related to me, and that she could vouch for me, would help support me.
Miran was chased off the forum crying, and traumatized. Growing up in a sheltered suburb of Delaware, Miran had never been accused of being ďprobably a lesbian who eats Junís pussyĒ or the like. I felt horrible. I still feel bad, but itís funny to us now. That really was mild compared to 10 years later, today.
The internet is a wondrous place, but itís also a clogged drain of anonymous hate to an extreme degree when it comes to Big Brother. Itís the reason I stopped watching Big Brother 15 and I know I did the right thing because my summerís been peaceful. This is the first summer in years that I havenít had my life threatened, or my family threatened, and my distancing myself from Big Brother has been better all-around.
I say Iíd never go back on the show because nowadays some fans take it so far that people losing their livelihoods is not enough. Threats of rape and torture and death, and harassment of all kinds and outlets, has become the norm in recent Big Brother seasons. No amount of money or thirst for fame could ever make me get close to any of that, even if I know Iíd win if I ever got back in the Big Brother house. I know I would, but it wouldnít be worth my family having to have to go into hiding for months for their own sake.
Itís not easy to turn off the hate when itís coming at you consistently in the public. Ignoring it is harder than youíd think, even though itís the easiest thing to say. Some Big Brother alum choose to stick around and interact with fans while others drop their Big Brother experience and return to life. Some do both, and some do it better than others and for different reasons. The more youíre in the public eye, the more everything.
Thereís a lot wrong with people who go into the Big Brother house, but theyíre exponentially outnumbered by the lots going wrong with fans outside the Big Brother house. Fan rage escalates every year. How far can it go?