Episode 14: Let Me Ask You, "Skintimate - Or Not?"
Bet you thought I was going to make a Brazilian wax joke.
We open on Rio. Just to catch up: Everyone’s on their way to the next task, sans Falafel who have FFed and Cousins who have been U-turned.
The first to arrive at the clue box are Blue Collar, who discover that the task involves bodybuilding and poses. But wait! They must get Brazilian body waxes to compete. Inside, the boys strip down and Eliran’s the first of the two on the table. He’s covering his face as the lady oils up his leg, and this promises to be painful for him and fun for us. An excellent combination that we don’t get from this show often enough.
Streets of Rio. LiMor get a cab, and their driver has no clue where the university is, even when Mor gallantly tries Portuguese. They forsake their driver, but not before Lior gets some yummy caramel popcorn! A funny moment. Talia brushes off a kiss from Koby, but Yasmin is more than happy to kiss her partner, and they are notably cuddlier in the interview.
University. As Romy/Michele arrive, Eliran gets his first tear, and David’s feeling the pain for his partner. Eliran’s too far gone at this point that he must laugh at this sticky situation he’s found himself in, moaning a la 40-year-old virgin. They have a new appreciation for women after this. Romy/Michele enter their waxing chamber, and as they are hairless ladies, the wax comes off less like Velcro and more like a banana peel. The girls wonder how Koby will deal with this, and speaking of them, here they come. Koby is obviously the first up for being waxed. Talia comforts him by singing, and it seems to work as we barely hear him say a word.
Streets of Rio. Falafel are now on their way to Arpoador, a rock between Ipanema and Copacabana beaches that serves as this leg’s pit stop, where indeed Ron is standing along with a lovely local in lemon yellow. The boys chatter in excitement, hoping that it will be the first time they’ll win a leg.
Coffee. Ma’Ayan/Batel are looking and feeling pretty darn hopeless. Whether it’s to put them out of their misery or not, they get the correct arrangement and get the clue. In the taxi, Ma’Ayan is her usual chipper self, but Batel is starting to crack. They talk about Romi/Michele, and how they’re in a similar boat, but Romi/Michele are better racers. Way to talk yourself up there, Ma’Ayan.
University. Romi/Michele lotion up while it’s David’s turn to scream and yell. In an interview, they do show off their smooth long legs. And now we have a moment where Sisters and Blue Collar rub on lotion in slow motion and lust over one another. This is simultaneously straight, gay, and lesbian erotica. Cool? Blue Collar is ready to pose, and they choose a rather old guy. D/D show up just then, and Dana must really not be a girly girl because she screams and stamps like a maniac when being waxed. ShiMin arrive, and hearing Dana’s screams, Shimi begins to sweat. LiMor arrive, and commence the sequence of the waxing of Lior. He’s a big guy so this’ll take a while. He starts to curse up the storm as heard in the preview, and Mor can’t stop laughing. Lior sees Shimi totally zenning out during his wax while breathing slowly while twinkly teahouse music plays, so Lior gets back on the table. More of ShiMin being lovey-dovey – foreshadowing much? TaKo oil up, and Koby looks like a teddy bear. Blue Collar learn their poses and look pretty good while doing them. Romi/Michele start the posing work as well. Romi comments on the weird eye thing their bodybuilder lady has going on, and it truly is weird. They bicker, and micromanaging Romi is told to simmer down.
Stage. Blue Collar are the first up. I don’t think they did too horribly, but we’ll find out soon, because we cut to the sisters doing their routine. Both teams complete their routines. Coral comments that the judges look angry. Surprisingly, the speaker of the panel speaks perfect English almost without accident, and the panel is not messing around because the boys get a 7. Only a 7? Man, these judges are picky. The head judge likes Romi, but the panel as a whole doesn’t like them, as they get an 8 and it’s back to the practice room for them.
Streets of Rio. Falafel comment on scenery on their way to the pit stop. They run up to the pit stop. Ron talks to them about the fact that they’re in winter clothes, and came last in the last leg, and get on with it…wait for it…a little more…first, just like we all knew. They are surprisingly reserved and calm about it.
University. Cousins arrive, and are shocked that almost everyone that was ahead of them is still there. This gives them a second wind – Batel can’t stop giggling, and Ma’Ayan hams it up, first pretending that her partner is giving birth, then asking the waxing lady to wax Batel’s mustache (teehee), and then singing a song which ends in her hugging the lady as she waxes, who probably just wants to get home to her kids. D/D oil up, and Debbie gets an odd boob blur even though she’s clearly clothed – I don’t know. They pick a rather young and cute guy in purple posers to train them, and of course they must drool over him and touch him. Elsewhere in the room, TaKo practice their posing. Talia looks like a walking skeleton. At the same time, Romi/Michele/Blue Collar decide to practice together, but it’s TaKo’s turn to take the stage.
Stage. Talia shows off her ballet moves as she Nutcrackers her way on stage. Head judge backhandedly calls Koby tubby, and despite their high energy, they don’t crack 10. Up next for their second try are Blue Collar, as Star Wars music plays, inexplicably. They get a round of applause and 11 points, which is a pass so they get the clue. Back outside and fully clothed, they get the next clue, which is an audio clue leading them to the pit stop, by asking them to find the place between the two beaches based on music clips from “The Girl from Ipanema,” and “Copacabana.” They figure it out in no time, and get the correct location from a local. Back at the stage, Romi/Michele are on their second try and they merit an even 10. Hugging their weird eyed bodybuilder lady, they get their musical clue…but they think at first that it means to go to Copacabana, but they get the clue in the same manner as the Blue Collar Boys.
Aproador. It’s not quite a footrace, but the two teams at the pitstop are clearly within a few minutes of each other. Blue Collar get there first. They must, of course, play show and tell before finding out that they’re second. Indeed, the sisters arrive next, while the guys are still on the mat, and are pleased to be in third.
Practice Room. D/D use this opportunity to ogle their bodybuilder some more and probably purposely screw up so they can have more bodily interaction. Debby, of course, comments on the butt.
Stage. Dana seems to do all right, but uncoordinated lefty Debby is all wrong. The judges think that the girls are sisters, which makes Debby very happy, then they give them a 9, making Debby very sad. Off to the practice room with you!
Practice Room. LiMor are with Romi/Michele’s weird-eye girl, Mor micromanaging as usual and telling her husband he’s all wrong. They argue about arguing and it’s all quite pointless. To her credit, Mor is a quick learner and her husband is not, so there’s that. ShiMin seem to be getting it quickly. Purples in purple dresses rather than bikinis, prepare rather quickly and seem to coordinate well, as we saw on the catwalk in Paris.
Stage. I guess there’s no queue, because here come the Purples. They do quick, sharp moves in perfect unison, and it’s looking pretty good. Their math skills momentarily leave them, as they fail to add 3, 3, and 4, but then realize that it’s 10. Congrats on the first first-try pass, ladies. The caption tells us that just like that, they’re in 4th, having been 8th at the beginning of the leg. Back onstage, TaKo take it on with much less ballet and more focus, and it pays off with a total of 13 points, including a 5 from the very impressed female judge. TaKo exit and are surprised to see the Purples there. The Purples get the clue, and TaKo do not. Talia stops the Purples’ cab and tries to bum the answer, but gets the brush-off, so they play follow-the-Persians. Remember, it was this leg that TaKo turned on the Purples, so in a way, they get what’s coming.
Taxis. TaKo have a funny sequence in which their cabbie knows where they’re going, and despite repeating the name of the place twenty times, they don’t get it. Both teams de-cab at Arpoador (well, only the Purples know that, TaKo are just chasing them at this point). It is indeed a footrace, with the Purples slightly leading TaKo. An out-of-breath Batel needs a short break to get some air, so the couple takes the opportunity to pass the girls, within sight of the pit stop. TaKo, you’re fourth, and Purples, you’re fifth. Same placings as last leg, but neither team is eliminated, so I guess everyone’s happy.
Stage. D/D are on their second try. It looks better than the first try. An 11 is what they get, and they’re off. ShiMin are up for their first try, and maybe the judges are getting tired or lax or both, because their routine is kind of boring. Cut to LiMor, who have a false start but quickly get it together. Back to ShiMin, they finish and earn a 10. Head judge likes Lior, and they merit an 11.
Taxis. After some randomly inserted Rio shots, we go to D/D, who are kind of in meh moods after having a day of more-than-normal arguing. They exchange some strong words and have a mom/daughter moment. They arrive at the pit stop smiling, however, and like those who came before them, repeat their placing, and it’s down to the two couples. LiMor get the answer, and ShiMin hop in a cab, hoping the driver will understand their broken English and hand gestures. LiMor get into a cab as well, fully aware of where they’re heading.
Arpoador. The editing makes it appear like the cabs arrive at the same time, but it’s clear that LiMor are there before ShiMin, and they are, earning them 7th place. Solemn music leads us to ShiMin arriving at the pit stop, and they know they’re hosed, but Shimi is at least complimentary of his girlfriend. Ron officially eliminates them. Yasmin hopes that she didn’t let Shimi down, and…end of episode? I can go to bed now? Please? And…Shimi keeps talking. He asks if he can put his bag down for a minute. We know what’s coming, but Yasmin does not. She explodes in shock as Shimi kneels down, and of course she says yes because she’s on national TV, but they do seem to be more affectionate to each other than in earlier legs, so I hope it all works out for them. We hear the clapping of many hands, supposedly the other teams as this great love story comes to a close, even though it’s clear that no other teams are around, or else we’d actually see them, since it’s not that dark. We close on a rare shot of the crew cleaning up the pit stop as Shimi and Yasmin have another kiss.
Next time: Havana! Old cars! Cigars! Tutti Fruit! Talia and Koby almost get run over by a pedicab.
(Does anyone read these?)
Who do you like?
Who do you dislike?
Have your opinions changed?
Will Shimi and Yasmin's love last forever?
Does this race seem like it's taking forever?
Will Little Richard make an appearance in Cuba?