Episode 12: Sun's Out Buns Out
We open in Paris. For the last time, hopefully.
Pit start. David/Eliran rip and read, and they’re headed to the samba-loving South American nation of Brazil. All the teams do the same. Talia clues us in that we are headed to Rio de Janeiro. Ma’Ayan wonders if she can take a train to Brazil. We get a tickets/driving montage. Purples are asked what city in Brazil. I sure hope they know. All teams are on the same flight.
Brazil. We see the Purples in the mob of teams, so at least they got there. They all flurry into cabs. In the Blue Collar Cab, David is looking forward to extreme sports, but Eliran’s more into extreme butts. I have a feeling that that is going to become a recurring theme. In the Sisters cab, they sing a song about bikinis. Coral likes warm places, and Romi confirms that this is a refresher. TaKo cab – Koby dislikes water and getting food stuck in his teeth. The parents share some orange juice in their cab. Ok, this is getting boring. Debby reveals herself to be a butt girl as well.
Samba dancers. They dance around flags, so it must be the site of a clue. Up in first: TaKo. Talia reveals the first task, in which they must pick a scantily clad samba dancer, who will take them to the beach, where they must samba the whole way to the Prom Queen board. Unfortunately, not even being in Brazil endows this team with rhythm, but at least they’re having fun. In second are the neon-clad sisters, who pick a hot mama in metal. In third, D/D arrive at the dancers, and they must ask the dancer if her boobs and butt are real. Turns out the boobs aren’t but the butt is. Inquiring minds want to know! They happily head off behind the other two teams.
Streets of Rio. Romi/Michele catch up to TaKo and are within about a block.
Cabs. Ma’Ayan and Batel’s cabbie goes full throttle. Batel notes how different the people look here. Falafel sings a song about the sun. It’s refreshing that this is actually a new leg, and the teams are all on equal footing again. Eliran is looking forward to erasing their earlier mistakes.
Samba dancers. Blue Collar pull up in 4th and get a lady in blue to accompany them. LiMor arrive in fifth and choose a chick in gold. They have some trouble keeping up. Falafel boys, now in 6th, must note their girl’s booty as well, and Itzik can’t stop staring. But here’s a twist! Eliran and Itzik must wear their winter gear for this leg. Living in Texas, I sympathize with them, but it is a good NEL punishment.
Beach. Barry Manilow plays as TaKo arrive at the beach, and now it’s a beach hunt. Romi/Michele arrive as arrive and start their beach search. I sure hope they’re at the right beach. They are, and pass up TaKo to be first at the Prom Queen board. I’m hoping that everyone’s over the Cousins/Dana/Debby thing. Romi/Michele mix it up by bucking the trend, voting for TaKo, but TaKo stick with the
Cousins. The teams arrive at a sand sculpture of three tanning ladies with hot heinies. Their next clue awaits them on the beach. Both teams arrive, and they must complete a butt workout with the locals. Coral’s got the hots for the instructor, and Talia translates her feelings and transmits them to the appreciative teacher. Koby compares the task to Jane Fonda in the 80s. The three girls are feelin’ good, but Koby’s feeling the burn. Talia shows off her ballet moves to the sisters.
Cabs. ShiMin are stuck in a spot of traffic, as are the Purples, but the girls get there first by a mile. Poor ShiMin and their horrible taxi luck. The girls, of course, pick a gal in purple. ShiMin finally get their dancer in last place.
Beach. LiMor are lost, allow Blue Collar to pass them up, and they choose D/D. Speaking of the devils, they dance up to the board in 4th, and vote for the Cousins, as they believe that they’re stragglers who need to go. Blue Collar and D/D pass the asses, and of course Debby must touch the sand. Both teams join the class already in progress. They all do some leg lifts, with David notably distracted. Falafel arrive in 5th, apparently having passed up the U-turn board. Whoops? They join the party on the beach. Debby touches one of the ladies’ rears, bringing the count up to 5. Then the workout ends. I sure hope that the three late-joining teams (D/D, Blue Collar, and Falafel) don’t get to skip out on this early. Doesn’t look like they get off the hook, as only the Sisters and Ta/Ko are seen with the clue, which tells them to samba the whole way on a bus ride to San Conrado beach. Blue Collar and D/D complete the task, heading off in 3rd and 4th, but it doesn’t matter much because all four teams catch the same bus, making the task infinitely easier as they basically fill up the bus, what with 4 dancers and 8 cameramen. Koby declares it the samba bus. At the Prom Queen board, ShiMin seal the deal and officially u-turn Cousins. Said cousins arrive next, and u-turn D/D, but not before actually complimenting them (well, Dana) on being strong, which I can’t argue with. They pick the D/D card up, with Ma’Ayan saying “nothing personal,” but Batel being like, “but it is kinda personal,” Ma’Ayan: “Yeah, I guess it’s personal.” Um…what? Having fallen way behind (2nd to 2nd to last), in walk LiMor up to the u-turn board. Obviously, they pick D/D. ShiMin appear at the butt task, and he’s got quite a roving eye. Could just be bad angles.
Party Bus 1. It lets out the top four teams (Sisters , TaKo, and Blue Collar) and it’s a Fast Forward/Roadblock. Fast Forward: Play beach tennis on a nude beach, nude. Coral votes for FF, but Romi says it could be really far away and impossible, and then they’d be screwed. Plus, they’re already in first, so they might as well just stay there. Roadblock: It’s a two-parter. Roadblocker must hang glide to their partner, who is sitting on a surfboard just off the beach. They must land, then swim to find their partner, collect them, and paddle back. Lots of stuff to take care of. Coral takes it for the Sisters and heads up the mountain. She’s a little unnerved. Romi is actually struggling more in the rough surf. Up on the mountain, Coral gets a pep talk from her gliding partner, who warns her that she could die. Great job, gliding partner. Back at the harbor, Romi looks pretty Rip Girls as she paddles out. Atop the mountain, Coral has a last minute minor freakout. Elsewhere, TaKo and Blue Collar do the rip and read, and David and Talia will be the air partners, leaving Eliran and Koby at sea. Eliran is pissed that he won’t get to glide, and David’s not pleased that he has to. Talia is super excited to fly, Koby…not so hot on the swimming.
Beach. Ma’Ayan/Batel join the beach workout party, so that’s everyone but LiMor…but here they are. Itzik almost kicks Mor in the face. Falafel are deemed done and collect their clue. Itzik is obviously attracted to the big booty Brazilian mama. They get back in Paris gear and head to the party bus.
Harbor (AKA where the roadblock is, which is also a beach, so I will be calling it harbor). Eliran wants to fly so badly. Both men head out on their boards.
Mountain. Coral is still in her mini freakout mode. Here come David and (possibly drunk) Talia, who does a weird little swaying dance. We know that Coral is not going back out, so here she is, jumping with a huge scream but then enjoying the view. She yells that she’s coming for Romi, who hears her sister’s screams.
Beach. ShiMin get their party bus clue in sixth. They are joined on the bus by D/D and Falafel. Yasmin is taking care of bus fare. That can’t be a good thing.
Mountain. Talia’s all, “shut up and throw me off this mountain.” She seems to enjoy the ride, and switches to English briefly. David flies off as well with little fanfare. In the air, Talia takes time to appreciate God and his creations. “God: Don’t mention it.”
Harbor. Coral comes in for a landing, but is kind of stumped as to how to find her sister in the big, big ocean. She is afraid of drowning and hesitates.
Beach. LiMor and Cousins get the party bus clue.
Roadblock Marker. Falafel hit the clue in first, and Itzik opts for the FF. They’ve had a lot of bad luck this past leg, but they’re willing to take the risk and head to the nude beach, knowing that they’re dunzo if anybody beat them to the punch. ShiMin and D/D reach the marker, and a much more chipper Debby actually volunteers to do the roadblock, and Shimi guilt trips Yasmin into doing it because he’s running out of roadblocks. Yasmin is the first of the flyers to be afraid of heights. Debby, on the other hand, is rather excited. Yasmin gets suited up and wants to cry. Debby gets suited up and ready, declaring that she’s not afraid of heights…until it hits her that she’s actually doing this for the first time. Of course, she must first flirt with the copilot, because if the worst happens at least she’ll die tryin’.
Harbor. Dana and Shimi are struggling against the waves. Talia comes in for a landing. She is unaware that she must find Koby from one of the now 5 racers in the water (Koby, Romi, Shimi, Eliran, and Dana). Unlike Coral, Talia runs right into the water. David lands and dives in and Talia, who is panicking, needs his help, and they head out together. Unfortunately for her, Koby is far, and Eliran is right here, and Blue Collar zips past the other teams, heading back to the beach. And they of course do the stupid, playing in the water before getting their clue. They do look hot though…well, mostly David. Route Info: They must do a last samba with their lady and head to Rocinha, one of Brazil’s toughest favelas, and search for their next clue there. Back at the beach, Coral finally gets the grapes to go into the water. She must have been either quick or lucky because we see her reunite with Romi a minute later as Talia’s still treading water. Both teams race in. TaKo do the “strategic” thing, or the natural thing, riding the waves in rather than doing paddling. Both teams arrive at the same time and are off following the Blue Collars.
Mountain. Debby makes her jump, and she seems to enjoy a task for one of the first times ever. Yasmin, however, is looking like she’s about to be tortured. She makes the jump…and doesn’t stop running. Her legs keep going and she’s doing a midair running man while breathing heavily and yelling. Debby comes in for a soft landing, as does Yasmin. Yasmin thinks that Shimi will be all proud of her, waiting and smiling on the beach…not so.
Party Bus. LiMor and Cousins are dancing. Ma’Ayan is pulling the arms of a clearly bored woman who probably just wants to contemplate her life choices. LiMor arrive next at the Roadblock, and get ready cause now it gets weird to the max. Apparently, Mor is forced to do this, since Lior’s over the weight limit. Mor refuses to even consider doing it. Ma’Ayan takes it for the Cousins, which was the correct choice because this is what Batel DIDN’T want to do. Good race ESP, ladies. Ma’Ayan heads up, flies, “tickles God” (her words, not mine), and is down on the beach lickety-split. Mor? Still refusing. At this point she actually responds to every single thing her husband says with “I am not doing this.”
Harbor. Debby stumbles into the water to rescue dear daughter and is actually being a champ at this. Ma’Ayan also heads into the water and finds Batel before they both take a tumble into the water. They beat D/D back to shore by riding the waves like Ta/Ko and are in fourth all of a sudden, because Falafel are fast forwarding, LiMor are being cranky, and Yasmin seems to have disappeared. Cousins and D/D depart in 4th/5th. Back at LiMor, she’s just plain yelling now.
Ocean. And…here’s Shimi, puking, complete with sound effects. Cue Yasmin looking dopily into the water. Shimi pukes. Yasmin bobbles. He paddles a little closer to her and she gets on the paddleboard that her boyfriend just puked all over. Ew. LiMor watch from a distance as Shimi/Yasmin ride in on the puke board. They embrace and Shimi seems appreciative and caring, and they kiss. We saw this guy throwing up a minute ago. His breath must be awful.
LiMor. Sad music plays as Lior walks off in anger and Mor is sitting teary-eyed. Finally, Mor gets up and says, “Let’s do this,” and end of episode.
Heading to Rocinha:
1. Blue Collar
6. Pukemi and Girlfriend
Contemplating whether to do the Roadblock or not:
Status unknown at this time:
Next time: Poverty! A dog stuck in a wall? Debby and Talia have officially sobered up and there will be much drama.
Are you happy that we’re finally out of Europe?
Is the samba music driving you nuts?
Do you like big butts and cannot lie?
Will Mor get up in the air?
Will anyone get naked? Or arrested?
Find out more (soon, hopefully tomorrow) on Brazil, ep. 2.