Hey-girl-heyyyyy! It's the HHO (yes, HHO...Head Ho) coming at ya with a scandalicious blog. Let's get to the dirty juicy gossipy stuff first. Firstly, it would seem there is a virus floating around the house called dumbbitch-itus. Jordan appears to be the one most severely infected, but Michelle surprisingly is showing signs and symptoms on dumbbitch-itus. Jordan is ACTUALLY campaigning to go home and give up her chances for $500K in exchange for Jeff staying? WHAT?! Lordy she is sick. And suddenly when Jeff is campaigning AGAINST her she gets more "attracted" to him. huh? If a dude I liked was campaigning for me to go home I'd promptly make my way into the kitchen, find the nearest sharp implement and slice away. Thennnnn Michelle actually entertained the idea of using her Veto on Jeff to guarantee Jeff to stay! WTF is going on in this house! Someone call a doctor cause we gotz a severe breakout of dumbbitch-itus!
Now let's get to some just down and dirty talking. As you all may have figured out, Jeffery isn't my most faves BB houseguest. Yes ladies (and boys) he is yummy to look at, but he doesn't want to "look bad", so he gets his girls (Jordan and Michelle) to do his dirty work. I hate it when people are 'too cool for school', pullleaasse. He keeps talking about how bad he wants to leave this house, and I'm thinking 'dude do you know how many people would die to be in here?" DEWSH! Plus he has no ass...literally none....negative ass...very unattractive. Let's move on to Michelle...I'm sure you've seen her sleeping episodes where she screams / moans EVERY night. I honestly believe there is something clinically wrong with the wench and maybe I should empathize with her....nawwww, that....biznatch be crazy! Then there is Jordan....yes America...she's as dumb as she comes across on TV I'm sure. I heart Jordan but damn gurllll the things that comes out of her mouth is almost unbelievably dumb. What about Natalie you may be asking....well of course I heart Natalie so I don't have anything really nasty to say except can someone buy her a comb? Also I've noticed LIE is actually in her name.
Let's talk some behind the scenes DISH (as much as I'm permitted). I don't know if you all know, but I've dreamed for the longest to get on BB and have applied EVERY season so I'm a huge fan....not a uber fan like Ronnie....just huge. But as a fan I had NO idea there would be so much down time in this bizzny.....I mean when I watch the show it seems like there is always something going down....but there really is a lot of just hanging out sprinkled with a little game talk here and there. I also didn't realize how quickly you'd adjust to the house....yes some days I wake up and think WOW I'm in the BB house!" but other days it truly feels like home. The cameras are completely not noticeable and you forget there is a dude behind that mirror. Ohhhh I just remembered a behind the scene hilarious blooper that I HOPE makes it on somewhere...Natalie is apparently terrified of anything that flys (from moths to bees to flies to beetles) so one day right before the live Thursday show, a beetle swoops in on Natalie. She goes bizerk and actually jumps/falls into the Jacuzzi! OMG hilariousssss! She did a Jerry!
Lastly I'd like to address the CHIMA incident. OMG! Expelled! WOWzer! First I wanna say Chima was probably one of my favorite people in the house....as soon as I saw her on the footsteps of the house I knew I'd like her. She is truly a strong, smart, funny woman; however, I don't think she handled the BB experience too well in general. There is ALOT of being told what to do in the house without any explanation (e.g. Go outside and sit up......or don't wear that.....or don't move this...or wake up now...etc) so if you don't like to be told what to do in general than maybe going on BB isn't the best idea. So fundamentally I think Chima just had a problem with the premise of the show itself (expect the unexpected) and being told what to do by Big Brother....then she lost her mind week one with the "have not" situation and I don't think she ever really recovered from it. Chima did what Chima wanted to do and Big Brother probably wasn't too happy with her. THEN the Mystery Power was used and she lost her mind...I tried helping her see past all the BS and reason with her but anything I would say she wouldn't hear. I tried telling her how lucky we were to be here, or I tried reminding her of the $500K, I tried telling her how bad quitting would look. NOTHING worked, plus Natalie and Lydia egging her on didn't help either. UGGGGH.....whyyyyyyy Chima whyyyyyyy?
One last tid-bit....Some of you may know that my 9 year anniversary with my Boyf (Alfonso) happened in this house. And I'm sure you saw how big of a goober I was when I cried and read his letter to me (LOVE YOU GUAPO!). I hope that one day I can experience the privilege of marriage with him and express my love to him through the union of marriage. I ask one tintsy tiny favor, next time a ballot or initiative or proposition comes through your state that would give myself or others like me a chance at experiencing what a majority of Americans already do, that you please consider allowing someone like me the honor of marriage.
Anywhoooo, it was a blast blogging it up with you all!